Week 3: Post 1
I feel like it is impossible, for me anyways, to meet or even see people without automatically judging them. After realizing that I do know these people in any way I started to realize how awful it is to judge them the first instant I see them. Now when I see people and think, “why would they ever wear that?” I think to myself, “Linzy, maybe that is just their style, people probably say the same thing about what you’re wearing.” I still judge people but most of the time I am able to catch myself when I realize everyone is an individual. I think the only way to make the judgments is to catch yourself and realize that you’re judging someone you may not know a thing about. Also, just remember that people are judging you too whether it be about your hair or your style or the color of your skin or your sexuality. Just be careful what you think about other people even though most of the time what you think stays in your head.
posted by Eleanor Rigby @ 3:53 PM
3 Comments
3 Comments:
Hi Eleanor Rigby,
I agree, it’s really difficult to quiet the judgmental voices inside of our heads. We live in such a competitive society, where what it means to be socially acceptable is very limited. You are right- everyone is an individual and has their own way of doing things.
One example that I’ve noticed a lot lately is how people judge other people’s parenting skills. Lately a lot of my friends have been having babies, and they all get so annoyed when people make negative judgments about how they are raising their kids. (It is annoying)! It would help if they would either keep their judgments to themselves, or make some positive judgments about the parenting skills of others.
I think that if we are going to make judgments anyway, it might help to train our brains to make more positive judgments. Instead of saying “whoa that girl’s hair is C-R-A-Z-Y,” it might work better if I thought, “her bracelet is really cool.” It doesn’t have to be that superficial, but you know what I mean! :)
I don't think you should feel bad about this naturally automatic human characteristic. How would you define something without making assumptions? I agree with the idea that we place value on these judgments sometimes that are not fair, like the idea of what they are wearing or their hair style some how gives us some insight into the depth of their sole. If we can take a minute to walk up to someone without expressing our judgments, and simply try to get to know them for whom they are, the world would be a better place. It isn’t easy to do, but in the end it gives us a better understanding of what is real.
It’s true that people are judging you as well! I often think to myself that no one would bother giving little old me a second thought, but you know, I bet that is what all the people I judge are thinking too! And it’s probably easier to correct yourself when you’re being judgmental about someone’s outfit, to just think, “hmm I wore that hideous t-shirt to the market last week when I hadn’t done my laundry. Maybe this isn’t a great reflection of this person’s best self!”
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